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Carbon Metal Grinder
Ooh, is that a Makita?

Nope!

When was the last time you were at a busy intersection and said to yourself "I wish I had a saw that could cut down these telephone poles!" All too often we get stuck in situations as such. Next time, bring your Carbon Metal Grinder with you. Comes with enough battery power to cut down about 38-40 telephone poles or one armored car.
$ 18,000

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Surface to Air Missle
Back by popular demand: Our economy ground to air missles! Using our new and improved rocket fuel formula, you can now attack government bases and neighboring cities up to 600 miles away! Order before the end of the season and get a free pack of skull and crossbone rub on tattoos!
$ 750,000.00
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Spy Sattelite
What better way to plot your ground to air attacks than this spy sattelite? This jewel can track up to 6,000 missles for you while you defend your secret base from the Calvary. Sorry, sold out
$ 0
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Oil
Keep your spy sattelite in good working condition with this premium oil. Warning: Not for tailpipe spray jets
$ 2.17
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Anvil
Now at superweapons.com, the newly redesigned areodnyamic anvil. Typically only useful at 32 feet per second, per second.

Special limited time offer: Contact a sales rep about piano to anvil conversion ratios, you'll be surprised what that smashed up piano is still worth!
$ 280.00

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Mystical Evil Poison
It's green! It's blue! It's choking your wife! (Hey, you saw her talking with Mr. Goodwill towards Men at that police shindig. Besides, she was your 4th anyways!) Mystical Poison is sure to stop even the most determined morning person from getting up again... ever! Tip from Aunt Griselda: "A favorite back home is to take 8 and dilute them in a fruit punch! Blend with a white zindandel to remove harsh stains as an added bonus!
$ 99.99
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Ronin Samurai
Ronin... until you own him! Throw a block party to show off your brand new samurai warrior to all your evil minions! Our new and improved samurai warriors are not like other vendor's samurai. Our samurai will not betray you and gut your intestines while you slumber. While unwanted debowlings do allow you a return on your samurai warrior (20% restocking fee), we're so sure that you'll be happy with your samurai that we have little doubt we'll see many returned to us alive. Remember, all SuperWeapons.com masterless Ronin Samurai Warriors are trained with all of our wonderful products, so feel free to mix and match accessories to your own personal satisfaction!
$ 8,000.00
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